Socializing & Homeschooling; Evils of Public School

Don't let anyone ever drag out that hoary old protest against homeschooling, "Oh, but your child won't have an opportunity to socialize with other kids." There are more social opportunities for homeschoolers available than we can possibly handle. And in far better social environments, too.

For instance, there's Scouting, where, despite any other objection you could make about it, the primary purpose of the organization is to learn how to develop friendships and place yourself in context with the wider community in a supportive environment. You can earn badges in conflict resolution and social manners - in addition to ones in elementary physics and computing. Or, there's martial arts classes, which give you exercise, physical skills, and humility while teaching you how to operate in a formal hierarchical social institution... and defend yourself against bullies. For that matter, there are chess schools/clubs, Lego classes, language classes, 4-H, sports, music, environmental groups and the entire range of service organizations. And church, if you're into that kind of thing. That's a freaking smorgasbord of social opportunities without having to add into it being imprisoned for six long hours each day into the same environment (essentially a pack of young animals vying for dominance) without the support of your family, with no way to retreat or take a break.

I'll save my screed against brainwashing and the origins of compulsory education for later. This may be a tricky topic for an educator to write about.

Public school is a snake pit, even for ordinary kids. I routinely hear or read people excuse this by claiming that kids won't learn how to handle adult life without learning how to endure abuse from peers in school; "oh, that's just part of growing up," I read. I'd like to know: to what adult life experience is this experience supposed to pertain? Aside from (possibly) the military or other institutions, in what other situation is an adult required to remain in the company of his or her age cohort with no ability to make choices about remaining, no way to avoid bullies, and no recourse for abuse? None. Not in this country. You are allowed to change jobs. You can leave your lunch table if you need to. And, I'd like to point out that this was not part of growing up for most of the history of humans. Psychologically and socially, we've evolved to be raised by an extended family unit or small group. This is also another pet topic... I'm on a roll with issues that have been simmering for decades, I believe.

One thing that school does teach well depends partially on the psychology of the kid. In learning how to deal with an unreasonable and legal-bound system, you can learn either powerlessness, how to control your frustration, or how to bully others. That middle possibility is obviously the best, if it can be achieved, but to anyone paying attention to the major K-12 educational issues, it's clearly the least possible.

I don't know if my older daughter will ever forgive me for not homeschooling her. I hear the note of resentment sounded at least once a week.