Life stuff - BFFs and babies

Rosie just loves little kids. One of her goals in the next few years, she says, is to be able to babysit. Yesterday, she was playing at the park with her BFF, who had two baby dolls with her, and the girls were holding them and pretend-baby-playing. It was a little surprising to see Rosie baby-playing, since she's never had the faintest interest in baby dolls. Human ones, anyway. She always plays with stuffed animals and pretends she's an animal mother. I'm reminded of some of the information that has drifted out onto the net and people's conversation about Tony Attwood's book on girls with Asperger's, and how he notes the differences in girls' presentation. Girls are more able to take social cues from another person to follow along.

On the other hand, some of the other things he's apparently noted is that girls tend to 'suffer in silence' and become very shy. This runs counter to my experience with the women friends I've known with Asperger's and HFA, who have been, on the contrary, very in-your-face and belligerent. But then, I'm attracted to that, so perhaps that's my personal sample bias, heheh. Maybe I've just never gotten to know a quiet woman aspie.

One of our local Asperger's/autism support groups has regular support meetings for young women; but nothing yet for girls. I keep hearing that in social skills groups, the ratio of girls to boys is low enough to be uncomfortable for the girls. Maybe that's where I need to focus some organizing effort, rather than in the more general homeschooling for aspie kids area. Personally, I always got along better with boys, but I can see that Rosie does need the company of other girls though she insists that she is a tomboy. One of her aspie friends, a boy, always gives her this incredulous look when she wants to pretend or role play anything but pirates. LOL!

On a side note, I know I should read Attwood's book on girls, but I have now noticed - and am willing to admit at this point - that reading the excerpts makes me nervous. Not for Rosie - I look forward to reading it for her. No, for me. I know already that I'm not exactly NT. But nearly every excerpt I read from an adult woman sounds like something I've thought or said or experienced. I look at the diagnostic criteria, and I don't meet them. But just barely. The criteria are there, it's a matter of focus and control for me. Objectively, I can take a step back and recognize that if there were such a thing as a diagnosis when I was a kid, and if anyone were actually looking, I probably would have had one of PDD-NOS or NLD. Maybe even a light Asperger's, if they were looking carefully, but probably a strong PDD-NOS. [Nah. Upon reflection, if they had to dig that hard we're talking something lighter.] I was fortunate (??) enough to be both intelligent enough to compensate for my behavior and have a parent who forced me to recognize and correct some of my behaviors. The ones that embarrassed her. (Although I am trying my damnedest to keep her from doing the same to my kid, because it was incredibly demeaning and freaking traumatic. For example, how the hell did she think making fun of my monotone speaking voice was a positive way to change it?)

OK, see, this is why I'm a little apprehensive about reading it. I know I'm going to be upset.